It was tough, but I decided to move on.

For the first time in my 14 years of work life, I thought I would be fired. If you have read my earlier blog on how it feels to quit a company, you would know that Iam not the kind who would hop jobs frequently. I stayed with my 1^st employer for a decade, and the 2^nd one for nearly half of that.

Here is my story:

I have always felt very blessed, having a strong foundation—convent educated. Growing up, I excelled in school, mostly in extracurriculars, if not academically. I was terrible at sports. Honestly terrible, but I still tried. (even now I lose a game against my 5 year old!). I attribute this to always having a good work ethic. It was how I was raised and though to be hard working and loyal. I was convinced that I could achieve anything if I put in the right amount of work. When I graduated, I quit a dozen of jobs before even waiting to take the first paycheck, until I settled for one that I believe best suited me. I had always been independent in decisions. I never let somebody tell me I couldn't do something. If someone told me no, I always saw to that I disprove them. 

Flash forward to present day:

I had been in project management for 10 years and been very successful. I had a manager push me for a similar role with slightly different responsibility. I had never done solely sales and I enjoy a challenge. So I thought, "why not?" It was exciting to be head hunted, it was exciting to be wanted, and it was exciting to try something new.

After a year of working, I felt like it was not the right choice that I accepted the offer. For the first time in my life, I felt completely out of place. From day 1, something was off. It was clear right away that the person they moved was not meant for the role they assigned. I thought I would be going into a 6 month training period and then the number game begins. When I got there I was handed a target list and told to go sell. I was very forthright about my lack of sales training and I'm not sure how wires were crossed. But I gave it my all. I worked as hard as I could every single day. I came to work with a smile on my face, ready to conquer the world. My activities were high. I was 100% committed to the new role. But what I was doing was not of any great value either to me or the company.

For the first time in my professional career, I failed. I failed miserably. I had been really unhappy the past few months. I felt like an outsider and like that I didn't belong to that team. It was clearly not the right fit for me and I realize that soon. I was fighting so hard for something that didn't make sense. Although I was given an option to get back to the previous position, I had such a fear of failing that giving up wasn't an option. And getting back means that I have fail in the current position. I did not want to take the label ‘failed’

I learnt that a nice salary was less attractive than job satisfaction. I learnt that being at a place where you don't belong is suicidal. And I also realized that there are jobs that are not meant for me. What I was doing and what I should be doing were two different things.

I also learnt that a supportive boss is very important to our own success.  One fine day, I called my boss and told it was not working fine with me and I decided to move on. It stung. It hurt. He wasn’t shocked. It was embarrassing. I told him that I had been feeling something was off for a while. I truly felt like I was given up on. He agreed to that it was not that I was performing below standards, but I did not get the satisfaction of working there.

I was not expecting to start a new position too soon. It could also be a sign that this was meant to be. Being employed for 15 years, I could not rest at home taking the tag of ‘Home Maker’, either. But I was lucky to rebound quickly. I know it was the result of continuous efforts. I am thankful. And I am humbled by the whole experience. At late 30s, I do not want to go out and conquer the whole world now. But if it is not the right place, with the right supervisors, it is simply not worth it. And that's okay. I am not perfect. I have flaws—I know that. But I always want to improve and better myself.

I hate being told that I'm not good enough or do not have what it takes to be successful.

May be that is the reason that I decided before anyone else call on me. No one wants to be fired.  I have no regrets. I take responsibility for my wrong decisions. I know this may not be the last time! (still wish it is). The fear of failure is the worst part, and that fear kept pushing me. I believe in myself and put the effort forth to do so. It's a very unique experience that is hard to describe. But ultimately, it's for the self-betterment. So I moved on…

Iam excited to write about my wonderful experience at my new position in my next post.

Pen you soon!!

Hair Styles

Hi Friends,

Tried some hair styles:

• Thank you Ma

I recently saw a fake interview over youtube. The interview was online over web-cam and recorded.

The position for was for a very responsible post; the job description told lots of work, may have to work standing most of the time; involves training, lots of responsibility, may be to such an extent that no leaves would be granted even if pre-notified, sometimes may have to work 24/7, not much personal time, blab... blab... blab... and so on. All the interviewees made faces, though desperate for the job [as it was the time of recession that this interview as taking place], this offer was not the one best opted for. And finally for the most awaited part --- the salary negotiation. The interviewer said '...may be would have to work for nothing'. Yes, I repeat absolutely nothing ! There was a big 'Naape' sigh from his audience. He continued, 'In-fact there were people working at this position'. All were curious as I too was to know how was that super human.

It is your MOTHER came the response. Yes, how true, every one had to agree. No doubt about it, it was the position that a mother takes willingly, nursing the little one day-and-night, changing nappies, feeding, training, teaching, counselling, the list goes end-less.

I am the second child in the family of three daughters. A kind of... . Not older to be assigned any responsibility nor the youngest to always be pampered. Amma didn't really know what she was doing raising a troublesome child like me, so there were a few rough moments when I was kid, moments that still hurt a little even now. But she has made up for those moments a billion trillion times over. She's the best mom in the universe...I may at times have given her a hard time and created problems for her, as I respected working mothers a lot (like my aunties), but having my mother at home has been such an incredible blessing I realised when I myself came to be a working mother.

She's so humble, so hard-working. She gets up when it's still dark out to make sure everything is ready for the day. She puts us ahead of her own wants. She cooks not one (as I do now), but three different meals a day plus how can I forget the home-made hot and healthy snack, which she constantly update to the new and latest item. She cleans and does laundry regularly for a family that doesn't actually recognise her near enough. Sometimes old fashioned though it is, but constantly updating herself to match the thinking of the new generation. Some women might not like that description, it even irks me a little bit; the somewhat servant-like, submissive typical housewife. But mother lives her life by the Gita, and she is always delighted to hear that she is living up to its standards, so I try to let her know that she is whenever possible. I try to tell her how much I do appreciate everything she does, but I should still say it more often. So here, I declare it to the world!

Without any hesitation and without an iota of second thought, she nursed me, in my most critical time of my life. May be I would have died, it was a medical emergency and I made up my mind...was almost prepared to face death, or may be so...do not have worlds how to explain. But that moment I wanted to live and prove that her prayer were heard. Come back to life and thank her for the life she gave me. As i was undergoing 'c'-section to delivery my first child, the operating doctor teasing said: “Moments ago I saw a baby being fed my her mother, out there. Now, that baby herself has a little one”. However old one is, he/she is always a little kid to his/her mother. May be it was from this day that I unconscious starting called her Ma instead of Mummy, as I used to call her earlier. It brought me more closer to her.  I was now able to see though her eye. It had only love, nothing else for me. In return, I try to do the same, though I know I often fail. May be because of the busy lifestyle. Now that's a different story altogether.

Recently she gave me another chance to realise how much she means to me. It was the annual car festival that we usually make it up since the time I remember. This time father did not accompany her. Still we [mother, my family, and  my sister's family] planned to meet at a common place and continue from there on. All went well until the climax: she was lost in the crowd. She did not carry her mobile phone for fear of losing it. The public announcement system was not functioning. The 15—30 min of search was horrible. I just do not want to go though it again. Without waiting for any instructions from anyone, I ran hither-tither screaming until I finally found her. Tears rolled down my cheek. Like a mother who tries to discipline her children, I began shouting at her for going missing. (How stupid of me! She was the one who taught me to walk and keep track). All is well that ends well. Another lesson for the day: Parents as they grow old, become/act more like kids. Now it is our turn to show love and camaraderie towards them.

---Dedicated to all Mothers who truly deserve the salutations of the entire human world today.

Annual Meet: An event to remember

To ensure that the Annual Day Celebration was as grand as never before, the HR team put their full time and enthusiasm to make it on the Big Day. The HR and Facility members, team up with some volunteers, were all prepared to make it a memorable day.

We started the day with a fruit drink, here at our campus and moved to accommodated ourselves in 3 buses waiting to take us on the nearly an hour's journey of 40 Km towards KR Puram.

The Company Outing, on the occasion of our Annual Day on 22nd March, 2014 was held at the Confident Ammon Resort which was an Egyptian themed resort. The mood was set for the same in the previous week's Fun-Friday event, where the HR team brought to us a quiz with the same theme named "Know more about Egypt".

On reaching the venue around 10 am, we were Banded [at wrist] and welcomed with a fruit drink at the venue by the host. Corporate T-shirts to mark the Annual Day were distributed at the venue according to the size requested by the team, who did not waste any time; and quickly changed to it to show the spirit.

Though a bit disappointed with the Smorgasbord Breakfast, things picked up fast as our pretty anchor Natash Rock really rocked the stage with her gift of gap; Shubha with the slide show preparation with which Sameer inspired all of us with his ever green and enthusiastic speech as usual on-time ending with a note of Thanks and farewell bid to Anil, and a quick intro to Shajith.

The much awaited MVP award were announced with the 'Stars': Got to know more about Kapil Sharma and the philanthropist in him. Following which were the Fun awards [or the 'Utterly Serious' awards as you can call them] given to Aditi, Ravi Teja, Jagadesh, Feroz, Padmashree, Ranjeet Mani, Roshan Vinayan, and of course Mr. Sameer Shariff, for his 'Risk'. I wonder who worked out those craziest and weird awards like: The Premjith award, Manmohan Singh award, The one who drives the oldest car, The one who works the longest and what not. It nearly kept us wondering on not just the field of specialization that was recognised but also the awardees.

‘Let’s Break free’ session for the Senior Managers was the best piece ever. Sachin, Shyam, Uday, Jagadesh, Vipin, Anil, Pandit along with Sameer showed us how young they were by heart. I was more than delighted to see the versatile genius and multifaceted personality of our senior team. They gave a wonderful performance showed their mettle specially in the Lungi Dance. Sachin went back to his college days and stole the show with his rocking dance. After that particular session, I could never look at him in the same way as before.

I laughed till my stomach ached or was it because it was time for lunch ? Whatever ! the delectable lunch buffet for both veggies and non-vegetarian was mouth-watering. I got to relish all the wonderful dishes that were served at the event venue.

Post lunch, I explored the little Egypt and had our round of photo session with friends, while a few had a good hand at the golf. The scorching heat of the Sun did not allow for any full match of cricket or volley ball, still some were able to warm up a bit. We slowly moved into the Fun Zone. With the help of the Event Manger we split ourselves into more or less tantamount four Teams: Blue, Green, Red, and Yellow lead by Sameer, Sachin, Shyam Shetty and not sure who lead the other team (sorry ! May be blinded by excitement). It was a great opportunity for each one of us to interact and socialize with all the Impellers and have fun together. Team Games like longest human chain, revamp, cross the bridge, fill the holed pipes, blind hit, and many more to prove the team spirit in us. Although officially the Blue team led by Sameer won; it was 'Team Impelsys' that actually won as said by Rocky-- the event Manager.

Following the energy filled events we were let to enjoy our time with indoor games like carom, tt, tennis, a few plunged in the water like little kids. I wonder if any made use of the gym and spa facilities that were available too. I continued our exploration of the place further along with the Tea/coffee and hot snack at the Pit stop. At the end of the day, completely exhausted, with heavy steps headed back on to our buses which dropped us back at our campus.

Overall it was a experience of Fun and Excitement, which I would like to carry in my hearts and minds for years to come.

Whom to trust now

Like in Frost's poem, the road road less travelled, i was now standing at the brim of my life, wondering which path to take. Sometimes it is so confusing as to what to do next when you do not know where the roads lead to. My mother advice follow the step of those who has seen enough. 

'Look before you leap' she said.  But remember 'He who hesitates is lost'. 

Knowledge is power, at the same time Ignorance is bliss.

Actions speak louder than words. but The pen is mightier than the sword. 

Nothing ventured, nothing gained. Also,  Better safe than sorry. 

What will be, will be. but, Life is what you make it.

Whoow, one can no longer follow the age-old- adage either. They are so contradicting. I found some more interesting one too. Here they go !!

If at first you don't succeed, try, try again. 

     Don't beat your head against a stone wall.

Absence makes the heart grow fonder. 

      Out of sight, out of mind.

Never put off till tomorrow what you can do today. 

      Don't cross the bridge until you come to it.

Two heads are better than one. 

   Paddle your own canoe.

A silent man is a wise one.

     A man without words is a man without thoughts. 

Beware of Greeks bearing gifts. 

      Don't look a gifted horse by the mouth. 

Clothes make the man.

      Don't judge a book by its cover.

Haste makes waste. 

    Time waits for no man.

You're never too old to learn. 

      You can't teach an old dog new tricks.

Do unto others as you would have others do unto you. 

      Nice guys finish last.

A word to the wise is sufficient. 

     Talk is cheap.

Hitch your wagon to a star. 

    Don't bite off more that you can chew.

The squeaking wheel gets the grease. 

       Silence is golden.

Birds of a feather flock together.

       Opposites attract.

Winners never quit.

       Quit while you're ahead.

Better to remain silent and be thouth a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt.

      The squeeky wheel gets the grease.

Actions speak louder than words.

      The pen is mightier than the sword.

Many hands make light work.

       Too many cooks spoil the broth.

The bigger, the better.

        The best things come in small packages.

What will be, will be.

      Life is what you make it. 

Cross your bridges when you come to them.

     Forewarned is forearmed. 

What's good for the goose is good for the gander.

        One man's meat is another man's poison.

With age comes wisdom.

      Out of the mouths of babes come all wise sayings.

The more, the merrier.

      Two's company; three's a crowd. 

Seek and ye shall find.

      Curiosity killed the cat.

Slow and steady wins the race.

      Time waits for no man.

The best things in life are free.

      There's no such thing as a free lunch.

A penny saved is a penny earned.

       Penny wise, pound foolish.

A rolling stone gathers no moss.

     Stop and smell the roses.

Nothing ventured, nothing gained.

      Fools rush in where angels fear to tread.

With age comes wisdom.

     Out of the mouth of babes come all wise sayings.

Money talks.  

    Talk is cheap.  

The only thing constant is change.

      The more things change, the more they stay the same.  

Two heads are better than one. 

      If you want something done right, do it yourself.  

Great minds think alike.      

     Fools seldom differ. 

Absence makes the heart grow fonder.

        Out of sight, out of mind. 

Whatever, you have stay your course and take support of the adages as apt.

Good luck